About 150 Miles Northwest of Bozeman, Montana – 14:31 Zulu Time Four point two miles up a windy road to the North-West of Bozeman, MT. – You know the type of country. It is a rugged, mountainous, yet beautiful land filled with steep canyons, clear creeks and towering pine trees. It’s the kind of place…

After “Pondering the meaning of time.” or “Pondering the passage of time.” Presidential candidate Kamala Harris Pondered a bit too far, and opened a “loosely-stable level 4-Zeta Wormhole to the not-so-well-charted Zerticular Retaeo.. Probably not the most prudent thing to do. Earlier, they were trying to keep Kamala away from Interdimensional gates, interviews, and Reteao…

Former President and Presidential Candidate Donald Trump Today, during a rally in America’s Heartland that is likely a swing-state, perhaps Iowa,: “This god-damn ear is a complete loser; and a complete fraud for not looking like it actually got hit with any sort of anything” said the ex-president. “I mean, that this point I would…

The New Government Terror List has been updated. This is a breaking story, and will be updated.

They’re fluffy, sedated, most are largely rib-less, and many even glow in the dark amazingly. You may have seen them listed on Craigslist as “exotic pets” or “Blowers” or even “Blades”. The so called “Blow Hamster” phenomena isn’t going away anytime soon and in fact seems to be taking off. We have found that at…

Somewhere, near a very clear fast running stream in Siberia- A Shirtless Vladimir Putin, in what many are calling an “escalator move” and others are calling an “escalatory move”, a very shirtless Putin today switched from riding a Horse to a Bear. “What is this guy doing?” said an unnamed person in the CIA. “We…

A devious squirrel who former President Donald Trump called an: “Instigator, and a loser” had its neck snapped earlier today. The squirrel in question allegedly chewed into the cable connecting the teleprompter and his handlers’ speech feed and the sophisticated software package that tells him every single word he has to say during a rally…

Washington D.C.- Earlier Today From a lukewarm bathtub with all of the bubbles really thinning out- After bath time today, with “gross raisin-fingers” from being in the water too long- U.S. President Joe Biden was told “He Can’t Attack Iran and “for sure” start World War 3 Until He Finishes All Of His Vegetables.” “There…

From A Catacomb Below Sacramento- Sources deep below Sacramento have revealed that California Governor (D) Gavin Newsom has now transitioned “roughly 80%” into a Sanguine Vampire. “We are closely following his slow, but eventual transition from regular human into a full blown blood drinking creature of the night.” “He goes into the coffin earlier and…

Downtown San Francisco – A woman was recently seen emerging from deep inside a bush near Market and O’Farrell Streets in Downtown San Francisco with “flowers in her hair” according to a very terrified Japanese tourist Hashi Tirimoto. “She crazy lady, she just, uh, she just jumped out of the bush! What is happening in…